Hola readers, it’s time once again for me, SlapStic’s resident nerd, to preview a game. This time I’ve chosen Silicon Knights’ “Too Human”. It is a game that will supposedly break genre barriers, and, more importantly, come dangerously close to “absolute cool”: the theoretical point where cool saturates the air to the point that things spontaneously explode and life can no longer survive. This has only occurred in simulations of a fight between Chuck Norris and Mr. T, so it’s a big deal. It is set in NORSE MYTHOLOGY, which is like the coolest kind of mythology ever; this was enough to solidify my interest regardless of quality. It is intended to be a trilogy in which you play Baldur, the guardian of the bridge between earth and the land of the Aesir in classical mythology. Details on the story are a little sketchy as of now, but the game play appears to be shaping up to be extremely awesome. You will be able to choose a class that determines how Baldur plays, enemies will be cybernetic versions of typical fantasy characters (I really want to fight a Robo-Slime in the vein of dragon quest) and there will be random loot drops like Diablo or WoW . With 18+ weapon CLASSES and tons of armor of all varieties, the odds of ever seeing a clone of yourself are insane. Plus, the developers have stated that late in the game you will have the option of getting cybernetic implants, although they will have “consequences”. I want a peg leg that doubles as a plasma launcher, but that’s just me. All in all, it appears to be a game that you should watch closer than the FBI would a farmer that suddenly becomes a millionaire, I’m talking to you Jed Clampett, you fooled no one. See if hype can be true Q2 2008.

- Jonathan Broom